(male ♪1) Busted.
[instrumental music]
♪ This here's a jam for all the fellas ♪
♪ Try to do what those ladies tell us ♪
♪ Get shot down 'cause you're overzealous ♪
♪ Play hard to get females get jealous ♪
♪ Okay smarty go to a party ♪
♪ Girls are scantily clad and showing body ♪
♪ A chick walks by you wish you could sex her ♪
♪ Bustin' another move like you was poindexter ♪
♪ Hey oh oh ♪
♪ Oh oh yeah oh ♪
♪ Just bust a move ♪ ♪ Oh hey ♪
♪ Oh oh yeah oh oh ♪
♪ Yeah oh ♪
♪ You're on a mission and you're wishin' ♪
♪ Someone could cure your lonely condition ♪
♪ Lookin' for love in all the wrong places no.. ♪
[cellphone ringing]
Come on! Oh.
Oh, dammit.
[rapid gunfire]
Oh.
[Engine revving]
[glass shatters]
Bob here says he has no idea
why anyone would wanna put a hit on him.
Wait, a-a hit? You mean like he was hired?
He didn't just wanna kill me himself?
Well, he's obviously a pro. He knew your route.
He knew the traffic, how to get in and out quickly.
It's what I would've done.
Well, in the abstract.
(Winston) 'You sure you didn't see anything?'
Maybe the make of the motorcycle
license plate number, something like that?
No, I told you. I-I was ducking.
I was reaching for my phone.
Thank God my wife called when she did.
Hey, listen, I don't want her to find out about this, okay?
She'd freak.
I mean, you know, she's just a schoolteacher.
Yeah, but it's a slippery slope, believe me.
Ask my ex.
I just don't get it
I'm like the last guy anyone would wanna kill.
Bob, why don't you have a seat?
We're gonna figure out who tried to kill you.
[sighs]
What do you do for a living?
I write communication software
for weather satellites.
(Chance) 'Where do you do this?'
Lendyne.
Lendyne, the defense contractor?
Well, talk about burying the lead.
Yeah, except nothing I do is classified
or even remotely secretive.
'I have the lowest level clearance possible.'
Hey, maybe it was a drive-by.
I did have rap on in the car.
Gonna go out on a limb and say it has nothing to do
with your gang affiliation.
So what do we do?
We do what we do best.
Blend into your life, hide in the shadows
wait for the threat to reveal itself
then we hope someone tries to kill you.
[instrumental music]
[indistinct chatter]
Somebody enlighten me here. Is this a fun couples thing to do?
(Winston) Hell, no.
One thing I don't miss about married life
is getting dragged down here every Sunday
'freezin' my ass off'
'missin' my 49ers.'
Still, actuary tables show
that married people tend to live longer lives.
(Winston) 'Right, says the guy who tends'
to make people live shorter lives.
Okay, they're splitting up.
'Guerrero, you and I flank Bob'
'Winston, take Angie.'
[instrumental music]
Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on a second.
Something here ain't right. Let me..
'Chance, you got eyes on Angie?'
(Chance) 'I think she's heading back to Bob.'
- Think she's got a gun. - A gun?
Guerrero, get him outta here.
Hey, dude, got a situation. Walk that way. Go.
What about my wife? Aren't you worried about her?
Yeah, more than you know. Go, go.
Chance, now would be a good time to do something.
(male ♪2) 'Hey, my fish!'
Thanks.
[people screaming]
(male ♪3) 'Hey, heads up, heads up.'
[indistinct chatter]
- Come on! Get in! - What happened?
Did you see the assassin? What'd he look like?
Yeah, looked a lot like your wife.
Wait. What?
[theme music]
I'm telling you, there's no way my wife is trying to kill me.
She loves me. We've never even had a fight.
That should have been your first clue.
- Oh, my God, it's Angie. - Don't answer it.
'Don't think of it.'
[indistinct chatter]
Hey, Ames. Where have you been?
Is there something wrong with your phone?
Um... no.
Mr. Winston, I'm so sorry. It was all my fault.
- We were in Las Vegas. - Vegas? For what?
Uh..
Mrs. Pucci.
Like to introduce you to our new client, Bob Anderson.
Oh, excellent! It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Anderson.
- So what brings you here? - 'Wife's trying to kill him.'
No. No, no, he's wrong.
It's not my wife. We're very happily married.
Yeah? For how long?
Three years, four months, two days.
Aw. You know to the day. That is so sweet.
Yeah, give it a couple of years.
As someone who's had firsthand experience on the subject
I believe that marriage is a sacred institution
one that only a husband and wife
can truly appreciate and understand.
Thank you. So you don't think my wife's trying to kill me?
Oh, yes, she probably is, if Mr. Chance believes so.
Well, in any event, you're in very good hands
so best of luck.
So, Bob, you wanna know who your wife really is?
'Her maiden name was Schwedak, at least was before'
she married her first husband.
What? No. Her-her maiden name is Monroe.
Who is that guy?
That's Jim Charles, her first husband.
It didn't end well.
(Winston) 'Scotland Yard found his body floating in the Thames.'
- He'd been poisoned. - This doesn't make any sense.
I know this has got to be overwhelming for you, Bob.
I kinda know how you feel.
Have you ever been married, Mr. Chance?
- No. - Okay.
Then you can't possibly know how I feel.
I've been with Angie for three years
and they've been the happiest three years of my life.
You expect me to believe it was all just a-a lie?
Look, as much as I would love to root
for the institution of marriage
the evidence here pretty compelling.
(Winston) 'Bob, listen, has there been anything'
in your wife's behavior recently
that would make you feel even remotely suspicious of her?
No! What are you.. Are you guys..
I'm telling you, we are completely in love.
'We're even supposed to go away for a romantic'
getaway weekend tonight.
Now, do you-you think she'd wanna do that
if she was trying to kill me?
'Come on.'
Best way to find out, let her try.
Wait. What?
[instrumental music]
Why is he still alive?
Look, if you just want me to kill him
I can do it in his sleep.
But if the point is to make it look like somebody else did it...
The point is we are running out of time.
And if we do not meet this deadline...
We'll meet the deadline.
(male ♪4) 'Wanna take it down to the truck?'
(male ♪5) 'Yeah, hold on.'
[speaking foreign language]
Trust me.
You and I will be long gone
by the time they find his body.
[instrumental music]
(Winston) 'Okay, she's comin' out now. You got anything yet?'
No. I can't hear a thing in there.
Probably using jammers.
If we're gonna find out what she's up to
we're gonna have to break in.
Interior doors are probably alarmed, so..
Yeah, I'll get the climbing gear.
- Seriously? - Yeah, man.
Hey, you gotta do what you gotta do.
Look, uh, don't know how to tell you this
but you rappelling off the side of a 40-story building is..
Not a good idea.
Oh, so what's this now
another crack about my size?
Well... yeah.
Ames, you're late. Suit up.
Maybe next time.
Hang on. Is that a wedding ring?
What? No, of course, it's not.
It's on your left hand, and it's on your ring finger.
I know what a wedding ring is.
Wait... that's why you went to Vegas?
To get married?
- No. - Yes.
How do you know?
Told you you should've invited him.
[dramatic music]
Hi, Bob.
- Hi. - Hi.
- You okay?
- Me? - Yeah.
Fine. Why?
I don't know. You just seem a little jumpy.
Jumpy? No. What do you..
I-I'm just, you know, I'm just excited
about our trip, you know?
Um, are you ready to go?
Yeah. Yeah, I'm ready.
Yeah. Can't wait.
(Chance) Alright, you two..
Lovebirds.
You must be Angie. Heard a lot about you, all good.
Bob, she's gorgeous.
Uh, Bob, who is this person?
- I'm Larry. - Yeah.
Bob and I work together.
Not exactly together. I'm in HR.
Bob, well, he's your husband
you know where he works, right?
[giggles] Yeah.
Um, Larry's car broke down.
- Yeah, fuel pump, second time. - Second time.
So his fiancee is supposed to be at that resort
up near our cabin so I..
Offered him a ride.
- Bob! - You just gotta drop me off.
I mean, you won't even know I'm there.
- Won't even know. - Appreciate it.
He appreciates it.
Okay, I'm gonna get the rest of the stuff.
Don't kill me.
[instrumental music]
[glass shatters]
We're in.
Fine.
So what's his name?
Who?
Alejandro.
Oh, of course, Alejandro.
And how long have you known Alejandro?
A couple of weeks.
Oh, a couple of weeks.
Look, are we really gonna get into this right here, now?
You're damn right we're gonna get into it right now.
What's the matter with you?
'How could you marry this guy?'
'You hardly even know him.'
(Guerrero) 'If anybody cares, they've got some'
serious encryption protocols
protecting something called "Project Graystar."
[cell phone beeping]
Turn around... now.
[tires screeching]
We might have to take this back to HQ to decode, dude.
Alright, what are you thinking? CIA, black ops?
No, more like OSA.
'Database logbook's all in Russian.'
Which means Bob's wife's is looking
a lot more like a spy.
Poor guy, he has no idea.
Yeah, see, that's what happens
when you marry people you hardly know.
[tires screeching]
Hang on a second.
'Bad guys just pulled up to the front'
and I believe they're headed your way.
Alright, dude, I'm streaming encrypted files to you now.
Alright, good, good.
Come on, come on, come on, come on.
[speaking Russian]
Now how you gonna get out?
Same way we got in.
[elevator bell dings]
Got it.
- Ames. - Whoa, whoa.
How do we know the ropes are long enough
to reach the ground?
Only one way to find out.
[gunshot]
[dramatic music]
[speaking Russian]
[indistinct chatter]
Okay. Well, that's kind of embarrassing.
Just talked to my fiancee.
Apparently, we're supposed to meet next weekend.
Yeah, got our signals crossed a little bit.
What can you do?
Uh, call the inn, get a room.
Well, listen, I'll be fine. I'll sleep in the truck.
- No. What? - Great.
That's great. Thank you.
Angie, come on, he'll freeze.
It's not that cold. He's fine.
Are you sure this is a good idea?
'She seems really pissed.'
If we're lucky, maybe she'll try to take us both out.
Who are you?
We're pretty sure Angie's a spy, Chance.
Probably OSA.
Her marriage to Bob is a cover
and now she doesn't need him anymore.
What's going on? What's happening?
[cell phone ringing]
What?
We have been breached, perhaps by CIA.
Did they find anything?
I'm not sure, but finish the job
'and keep your eyes open for anything suspicious.'
We're headed back to HQ right now
to try and decrypt the files
find out why OSA wants Bob dead.
So listen, watch your back.
For all we know, she could already be onto you.
Looks like he's got sat reception too.
What?
Who?
Never mind, I'll handle it.
(Chance) Looks like we're in for an interesting evening.
Ahem.
Oh, hey, Angie, listen, um
I've been thinking, I really feel bad about today
so maybe Bob just gives me a ride down the mountain.
- Tomorrow... - 'Nonsense.'
No, Larry, you're not going anywhere.
[instrumental music]
So medium, medium rare, or bloody?
Uh, either.
Why don't you let me do that for you?
- Yeah. - No, it's okay.
- Oh! I'm-I'm sorry. - Oh.
Um, must be the altitude.
How sweet. Thank you.
Excuse me. Oh.
'Excuse me.'
'Ahem.'
'Oh, Bob, by the way the body shop called.'
Um, what, uh, what was that about?
Uh, just a little fender bender.
- Not to worry. - 'Oh, okay.'
Well, just as long as you're alright.
You know, this is really great and I hope
you're not just doing this for my benefit.
Well, you know, it's not often
I get to cook for more than just Bob and I, so..
I didn't want to miss my chance.
How about a toast?
Salud. It's Italian.
Salud.
- Salud. - And salud.
[gurgling]
[clears throat]
Kharashow.
Oh, thank you.
- Bob? - 'Yeah?'
Now would be a great time to go get some firewood.
Right now? I'm eating.
Pass the salt, will you?
Get the firewood, Bob.
Okay.
Getting the firewood.
Nice spread. I thought for sure you'd be serving borscht.
Talk fast, CIA, what do you want?
Well, first of all, I'm not CIA.
But secondly, I think it's pretty clear what I want.
I want Bob alive.
Then why don't you just go ahead and shoot me?
Because I don't like to shoot unarmed women.
Company policy.
Feeling a little light there, by the way?
Took my clip, but put my gun back.
Impressive. Didn't even notice.
'Did you?'
Nicely done.
Spasiba.
[intense music]
Ah!
[groans]
Aah!
Oh!
I'm back.
Go!
This way. Go.
Go!
What the hell are you doing here?
I told you I could handle it.
You have said that before.
I am here to make sure.
Yeah, yeah.
Come on, answer.
Damn it, he's not answering his phone.
We gotta figure out who the hell it is
we're dealing with.
Come on, just forget about the sequencer.
Have you tried a backdoor?
Yes, twice. Just chill.
[cell phone rings]
Aren't you going to answer that?
Hi, honey. No, I-I'm still at work.
No, of course I wanna talk to you, and I'm sorry..
I'm ain't getting them no present.
I don't care.
How you gonna invite everybody in the office except me?
Dude, if you haven't figured out why you weren't invited yet..
Give it up.
Alejandro wanted me to tell you that he's got a great picture
of you playing sax with the band.
Great.
Yeah, military satellites, I get it.
Why in the hell would the Russians be interested
in a weather satellite?
Question is, what has it got to do
'with them wanting Bob dead?'
Whoa! Back up. What the hell was that?
Dude? Why does the OSA have a file on Ilsa's husband?
(Ilsa) 'I'm curious..'
Shut it down, shut it down.
Curious about what?
Well, whether or not Bob's wife
is actually trying to kill him or not, of course.
Oh.
Why? Is there something else?
No. What you talkin' about?
No.
Where are they going?
Exactly where I want them to.
We're pinned!
We're gonna go back to the cabin and hotwire the truck.
Um, why aren't we doing that right now?
Because I think that's exactly what she wants us to do.
I just can't figure out why.
'Unless..'
Lift your head up a little bit.
- Are you crazy? - Come on.
[gunshot]
Oh, my God, she is trying to kill me.
Yeah, but she didn't.
Come on.
[gunshots]
What are you doing?
'Chance, talk to me.'
Wow, she's good. She's really good.
What the hell are you talking about?
Finish them off.
Good news. Your wife loves ya.
- Come on. - What?
I'm happy for you, Bob.
Happy for.. Are you kidding?
My wife tried to kill me yesterday.
He just means he's happy you're still alive, Bob.
Uh, no, he means he's happy
that Bob's wife still loves him.
Score another win for matrimony.
Bob, what I'm saying is, your wife isn't
trying to kill you.
She's trying to make it look
like she's killing you.
Okay, a world-class assassin like her
she doesn't miss as often and as closely
as she does with you.
I'm betting that she rigged the explosives
on the truck to make it look like you were both killed.
So you think she had an exit strategy?
I think she still has one.
Even if she wasn't trying to kill me
she was still trying to kill you.
Right. She's not in love with me.
She's in love with you.
Aw.
(Bob) Even if that's true
who could she possibly be working for
that would make her want to fake my..
Her..
Our deaths?
Natalia Petrovic?
That's the little woman's real name.
She was born in St. Petersburg
and she graduated from University of Moscow
where she was recruited to the OSA
a secret branch of Russian intelligence.
Why would they want Angie to marry me of all people?
Because the encryption code
you were working on wasn't really
for weather satellites.
According to our Russian friends
the code was actually to protect NSA spy satellites.
(Bob) 'So what do we do now?'
Call your wife's bosses give them what they want.
You-you mean, you mean me?
Now, listen, I think the only reason they wanted to kill you
is because they thought you were close to finishing the code.
Which they don't want you to do because they'd already
hacked into the old one.
Okay, but if I give them the new code
they're gonna kill me anyway.
I don't think so. You see, I think Angie...
Natalia.
Natalia isn't gonna let that happen.
So you call them, arrange a meeting
tell them you want to trade the code for your life
see what happens.
See what happens?
You mean put all my trust into a woman
who's been lying to me all these years?
That's-that's..
Crazy?
Granted, if I'm wrong, you're probably dead.
There's no denying that but if I'm right
you just might get Angie back.
Sorry to interrupt. Dude, you got a second?
Yeah. Think about it.
[sighs]
So what are we doing down here?
When we found that file on Angie
we also found a file on Marshall Pucci.
'Photo was taken at a local hotel'
two days before he was killed.
Who's the woman?
You mean who's the mistress?
Could be somethin' else.
Either way, dude, not looking good.
Okay, let me know what you find
but come to me first with whatever you dig up.
I don't want Ilsa to worry for no reason.
(Ilsa) 'No reason for me to worry about what?'
We got that off the hard drive
of a Russian spy agency we infiltrated.
And may I ask you why you wouldn't show it to me?
Wanted to check it out first
before we bothered you with it.
Bother me?
What if there were others involved in his killing?
This woman could lead us to knowing more of the full story.
Or it could lead us to something else.
Look, Ilsa, I know this has got to be hard
but some things are really better off left alone.
[instrumental music]
Yes, yes.
I'd imagine to a person like you
that would seem to be the case.
A person like me?
A person who's never been in a relationship
with someone he actually trusts
'someone who's always been alone.'
And while your professional threat
assessment is appreciated
I would very much like to know
more about the woman in this photo.
If I learn anything of import
I'll be sure to let you know.
Good day.
Okay, I thought about it.
I'll do it.
Not 'cause I trust Angie.
But, um..
'Cause I trust you.
Good. I'm glad somebody around here does.
'Just give them the hard drive.'
Let us take care the rest.
Okay, uh, and-and if you don't mind my asking
what-what will that entail, exactly?
It depends. On your wife's first move, then we go in.
Okay, um, w-what's my wife's move?
I'll recognize it when I see it.
Don't worry. She's not gonna let them hurt ya.
Hmm.
Just in case, neither will we.
Okay, I'm here.
What's so important?
Sit.
Okay.
- Isn't that... - It is.
'The question is, who is the woman with him?'
This is what you and I shall endeavor to find out
this afternoon.
Help me.
'Been, uh, reading the manual.'
I know, right? Me, go figure.
Showtime.
Is Angie with them?
Can't tell.
Windows are tinted.
Alright, muscle's getting out now.
Whoa. Packing some serious heat.
You are a trusting man, Bob, coming out here by yourself.
I admire that.
'You did bring the code, I presume?'
[laughing]
I want my wife back first.
Far be it from me to stand in the way of romance.
Come to your husband, Natalia.
'Come.'
Okay, he gave 'em the code. Now what?
And this time, do not miss.
[intense music]
Chance, she's armed! She's gonna shoot him!
I'm sorry.
'I'm sorry.'
Her finger's on the trigger. Talk to me, Chance.
Nah, it's okay. She's just playing them.
- 'Are you sure?' - Trust me.
She's got a plan.
Uh, dude..
Looks like Angie just shot Bob.
'Chance? Chance!'
Easy, Bob, easy.
Just breathe. Just breathe.
She shot me. Angie shot me.
Whoa, she really shot him.
Well, I told you.
I'm aware that she shot him. I knew it.
This is perfectly execute, the bullet went clean though.
It's less than a centimeter away from his heart.
She's a pretty good shot, I'll tell you that.
That's beautiful, man.
What the hell are you talkin' about?
Guys, am I gonna die?
Bob, you're gonna fine.
She had to do it, make them think
you're really dead.
I don't understand.
Because it's un-understandable!
It's a clean shot, dude. He's gonna be fine, alright?
She planned it.
She planned it so they won't keep comin' after you.
So that was her move?
Pretty good move.
She loves me.
Angie loves me.
Oh, brother.
Now, I gotta go kill her.
What?
Did he say kill her?
[speaking Russian]
I don't know about this.
We can't count on her missing on purpose again.
We're not.
Speed up a little bit, will you?
♪ Breathe the pressure ♪
♪ Come play my game I'll test ya ♪
♪ Psycho-somatic addict-insane ♪
♪ Breathe the pressure ♪
♪ Come play my game I'll test ya ♪
♪ Psycho-somatic addict-insane ♪
[speaking Russian]
♪ Exhale exhale exhale ♪
[instrumental music]
I don't suppose I can talk you out of this.
Nope. Hit it!
[speaking Russian]
♪ Psycho-somatic addict-insane ♪
♪ Breathe the pressure ♪
♪ Come play my game I'll test ya ♪
♪ Psycho-somatic addict-insane ♪
[speaks Russian]
♪ Exhale exhale exhale ♪
♪ Come play my game ♪
♪ Exhale ♪
[instrumental music]
'Angie?'
I was worried I was the only one who could make that shot.
To tell you the truth, so was I.
I need a drink.
Ready, Bob?
Whoa, what-what happened?
Did-did they get away?
They got away, Bob.
Did you..
Did-did you kill Angie?
No, honey, he didn't.
- Angie. - Hi.
I love you, Bob.
I love you too..
Natalia.
[both grunts]
So I guess you're the love expert now.
What, are you waiting for me to give you an apology
for doubting you?
Love is never having to say you're sorry.
Oh, why don't you shut up?
Even after you shoot somebody in the chest.
(Winston) 'So, um..'
Uh..
Ahem!
'We'll alert the NSA about that code.'
The one you gave them will never go operational.
I know.
I never gave it to them.
What?
You didn't give them the drive?
No, I gave them the drive.
It was just infected with a virus
which means it'll have corrupted the code by now.
Ballsy. I like it.
That's amazing.
Nice move, Bob. Not bad.
Listen, I can't thank you all enough.
I wanted so much for what you were telling me
about Angie to be true, and, uh, now I know it is.
Yeah, our relationship may have started out a lie
but, um, it became very real.
'Yeah.'
Normally, it's the other way around.
I think what Winston meant was
it's not the lack of love
but the, uh, lack of friendship
that makes for an unhappy marriage.
- Did you make that up? - Nietzsche.
I take it this means the mission was a success?
Oh, absolutely.
My faith in the institution of marriage
has just been officially renewed.
Well, good.
I'm glad we could be of service
and I wish you both the best of luck.
- Thank you. - Thank you.
Listen, on the subject of luck
you guys are gonna need all you can get
to stay alive.
By now, Ivan knows he doesn't have the code
and he's probably not gonna forget that.
Yeah, it's not a problem.
We have an exit plan.
Uh, we-we do?
Of course.
Every good spy has one.
Although, um, we could use your assistance
on a few things.
Alright.
Any preference on your new names?
- Winston? - Hmm?
I'm really sorry.
I should have invited you to the wedding
but... I knew you'd think it was a mistake.
Let me tell you something.
Ah, what the hell.
Ain't like my marriage turned out that great.
What the hell do I know?
A lot, apparently.
Alejandro and I are getting an annulment.
I mean, he is great and all but you were right.
I hardly even know the guy.
Plus, I'm totally not suited to be with a Pisces.
I mean, I'm a Scorpio. What was I thinking?
I know, I know, I wasn't.
I just wanted to apologize for not telling you
about the photo.
I didn't want you to have to endure anything else
considering what you've already been through.
Apology accepted.
'But you should know that there's nothing'
more important to me than making sure
that there's no one else out there who could have
played a role in Marshall's death.
- I understand. - I don't think you do.
- Yeah, you mentioned that. - 'I'm sorry.'
I don't mean to sound so harsh.
But?
I don't think you've ever been in love.
And that makes all the difference.
[instrumental music]
Just want to say I hope you guys
have a wonderful life together.
- Thanks, Chance. - 'Thanks.'
You have no idea what this means to us.
Welcome aboard, Mr. and Mrs. Schneider.
Uh, Schneider?
How many identities do you have?
Does it matter, sweetheart?
Ya liubliu tebia.
Uh, it means I love you.
[music continues]
[theme music]